How To Guide
How to Help a Friend
1. Listen to Them.
Ask them to tell you whatever they want to tell you. Often the first few words will be the most significant.
2. Be For Them - Don’t Collude With Them.
What they are experiencing is theirs and not yours. Don’t join them in their reaction, don’t agree or disagree, don’t argue, don’t commiserate, don’t get angry or upset on their behalf, don’t judge.
3. Ask Before You Offer.
When they have said what they have to say ask them if they want something from you. If you have suggestions ask them if they want to hear what you have to say before you offer.
4. Empower Them.
Encourage them to make their own choices.
5. Respect Their Choices.
They may not choose what you think is best for them but respect their right to choose for themselves and, barring legal or deeply moral issues, be prepared to support them in their choices.